Vocaloids as Greek Gods
by BlackIceReiya
Summary: Every god in this story is going to go through a sex change. And the moment I set Kaito as the god of beauty...I knew deeply, this isn't going to end well.
1. Character Arrangement

Yup, I was drunk.

**Zeus:** Miku…Oh god, I'm going to see leeks falling out of the sky instead of lightning, aren't I?

**Poseidon:** Luka, why not? Tuna.

**Hades:** Rin…The god of death with tsundere issues, this is going to be awesome.

**Athena:** Len, because I don't know where to put him at.

**Ares:** Meiko, you'd probably see this coming.

**Aphrodite:** Kaito…This is not going to end well.

**Apollo:** Yuzuki Yukari, everyone automatically assume that Rin and Len was going to become Artemis and Apollo…NOPE!

**Artemis:** Gakupo, because he's the only one with purple hair like Yuzuki Yukari.

**Hephaestus:** Gumi, because I'm drunk.

**Dionysus:** IA, I want to see her drunk and killing people.

**Hera:** Mikuo…I was really drunk.

**Hermes:** Kaai Yuki.

This is going to be fun.


	2. I call it randomness

**Well, let's start with the most famous story where Hades kidnaps Persephone. **

**Only, I'm going to twist it up, not a little, but a lot.**

Warning: This is not your usual Greek Mythology. The story is made under the hands of a crazy author under the supervision of idiots and morons. Randomness is everywhere. Rated T for Language. Viewer discretion is advised.

* * *

Chapter 1: Best friends are people that call you by your most hated and most embarrassing nickname even when you're old as hell.

You know it's a busy day in hell when the god of the underworld buys an espresso from Starbuck.

"You shouldn't drink too much coffee, Rinny." The god of wisdom, Len grinned, "It's not good for your body."

"Shut up, I'm immortal." Rin replied, enjoying the feeling of the bitter liquid flowing down her throat and the aroma of the drink filling up her lungs.

"Are you guys really sure we're supposed to be running around the human realm?" Yuki, the god of trade questioned.

"Humans are stupid," Rin answered her question quietly so that no human hears it, "I could walk in and buy a Prada bag for Miku, a ton of ice cream for Kaito, a dagger for that crazy-ass Meiko while wielding a katana and they still won't notice a thing."

"If I start messing with their iPhone's auto-correct system, you think they'll notice?" Yuki asked with a dangerous smile on her face. "I've been playing with it for months now and I still don't get tired of it. Man, you won't believe what I changed the words into."

"What exactly did you changed it into?" Len asked curiously.

"I changed every 'you' into 'Jesus', then I changed every 'fuck' into 'love'. Words like 'ok', 'o', 'sure' turns into the word 'Oreo'." Yuki laughed, "Most fun I had in years!"

"Don't say the F word, children shouldn't say that," Len commented.

"I'm at least four thousand years old," Yuki scowled, "Shut the hell up!"

"Speaking of hell," Rin looked at her watch, "I better get back to work."

"That fast?" Yuki activated her puppy eyes mode, "It's only been three hours."

"Your four thousand year old mutt eyes aren't going to work on me," Rin smiled coldly, then she drank the remaining coffee and left.

* * *

"She's beautiful…"

"Shut your pedophile and also retarded stalking ass up!"

"Oh, come on, Miku." Rinto stared at the pictures of a girl, "Get over here and look at Rin. She has got to be the most beautiful-"

"The last thing I'll need is your ghetto ass trying to flirt with my best friend. Ain't no way I'm going to let you touch her." Miku shouted out loud.

"Can you tell me something about her? Anything?" Rinto ignored her comment and asked for Rin's information. "Her schedule? What type of shampoo she uses? Her favorite activities?"

"No way, bitch." Miku glared at the yellow haired boy who's probably obsessed with the thought of dating her best friend, "Like I give a cross-eye glitter flying unicorn about your obsession with Rin. You better flipping James Bond the fuck out of the way 'cause I ain't doing shit."

"Do you have to be so random? The hell is a cross-eye unicorn anyway?" Rinto asked, "And why do you sound like you're from the ghetto?"

"Because the author made me sound like this, you got a problem? Tell that to her and see if you get a response. The author's probably going to be like 'Nope, to hell with you'." Miku answered.

"Come on, help me out?" Rinto pleaded.

"Hell no."

"Five bucks?" Rinto asked.

"Ain't no way five bucks going to buy away my loyalty for Rin!" Miku shouted.

"Two boxes of leeks?"

"DEAL."

Well, that escalated quickly.

* * *

And then we take a quick look at Mount Olympus…

"Yo, Rin!" IA's voice echoed through the room, her phone holding a bit too high above her ears, "Need you here!"

"You kill my character and I will smash you into a pulp!" Meiko shouted.

"IA, you're drunk! Rin won't hear a thing!" Gumi screamed at IA while trying desperately to win the game, "Luka, just…get…GET THE HELL AWAY!"

"Get Rin into our team, NOW! We need her! Anymore longer and we're going to lose…Meiko, you touch my hair and I'll flood your room with seawater for the rest of Summer."

"Hey, guys! Rin says that she needs to work on documents or something." IA's drunk voice echoed.

"I don't care about her work; get her ass over here right now! I'm ordering her, I'm the god of sea, she has to obey me!"

"But I'm the god of the underworld!" Rin's voice screamed out from IA's phone.

"Like I even care!" Luka screamed back, "We need you and your professional gaming brain here right now!"

"God damn it!" Gumi stomped her feet, "I lose!"

"Oh yeah!" Meiko cheered loudly beside her.

Outside of the room, Mikuo quietly thinks to himself…

How the hell is the human race still surviving under the hands of these gods?


End file.
